20 Things Adoptive Parents Need to Succeed

Book excerpt: Do I have what it takes to be a successful adoptive parent? Does my child consider me a successful parent? Will I ever hear my rebellious teen say, “I love you”? What tools do I need to succeed? In her groundbreaking first book, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew, Sherrie Eldridge gave voice to the very real concerns of adopted children, whose unique perspectives offered unprecedented insight. In this all-new companion volume, Eldridge goes beyond those insights and shifts her focus to parents, offering them much-needed encouragement and hope. Speaking from her own experience as an adoptee and an expert in the field of adoption, Eldridge shares proven strategies and the moving narratives of nearly one hundred adoptive families, helping parents gain a deeper understanding of what is normal, both for their children and themselves. By first strengthening yourself as a parent, you’ll be able to truly listen to your child, and to connect with him on every level, by opening the channels of communication and keeping them open forever. Then you and your child can grow closer through the practical exercises at the end of every chapter. Discover how to • be confident that your role in your child’s life is vital and irreplaceable • pass on the legacy of healthy self-care by assessing and regulating your stress • communicate unconditional love to your child • talk candidly with your child about her adoption and her birth family • teach your family how to respond positively to insensitive remarks about adoption • connect with other adoptive families–and build a support network • plus learn to become a “warrior” parent…settle the “real parent” question…cope with emotional triggers–what to do when you “lose it” . . . celebrate the miracle of your family…and much more