When Gay People Get Married

Book excerpt: In this book the author offers a look at how gay marriage is actually working, by taking readers to a land where it has been legal for same-sex couples to marry since 2001: the Netherlands. Through interviews with married gay couples we learn about the often surprising changes to their relationships, and the reactions of their families and work colleagues. Moreover, he shows how the institution itself has been altered, exploring how the concept of marriage itself has changed in the United States and the Netherlands. The evidence from around the world shows both that marriage changes gay people more than gay people change marriage and that it is the most liberal countries and states making the first moves to recognize gay couples. In the end, the author demonstrates that allowing gay couples to marry does not destroy the institution of marriage and that many gay couples do benefit, in expected as well as surprising ways, from the legal, social, and political rights that the institution offers. This book is a primer on the current state of the same-sex marriage debate, providing new insights into the political, social, and personal stakes involved.